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Optimize Your Life: Relationships

August 12, 2018

The "Optimize Your Life" series continues by taking a look at RELATIONSHIPS. Consider the tips below to reevaluate and strengthen fulfilling relationships in your life.

 Identify and Take Charge of Your Needs.

 

All humans share five basic relationship needs: friendship, love, touch, intimacy, and sex. While this may seem straightforward, relationship needs often overlap, resulting in ambiguity when it comes to determining actual needs.  For example, someone starved of touch may mistakenly turn to sex to try to fill their void, meanwhile, what they really need is a good massage.

 

Check in with yourself by reflecting on the following questions:

  • What type of relationship are you really craving?

  • Which of your relationship needs are currently being fulfilled, and which ones could use some attention?

Brainstorm new ideas on how to fulfill a particular area that is lacking.

 

Keep in mind that one person can rarely fulfill all five needs! Take a look at your relationships and determine how each plays a role in your life. 

 

Focus on the Small Things. Start each day by writing down five things you are grateful for. Keep them in a notebook on your bedside table, or hang them around your home or office for reminders throughout the day. 

 

Keep Communication Open and Regular. Do your best to be on good terms with the people in your life. Communicate with them regularly in person or via FaceTime, telephone, or e-mail. 

 

Make Amends. Who are you on bad terms with? Who would you avoid if you saw in the street? Make a list and take action. 

 

Celebrate What's Good. What is right, right now? Focus on and be grateful for the things in your life that are going well, then, take action one step at a time to improve your life. 

 

Work on Constructively Releasing Anger. What's really going on when you yell at your children or blow up at your partner? Society teaches us to suppress anger, but when we finally reach our boiling point, we tend to take it out on the people we love most.

 

Next time you feel anger bubbling up, excuse yourself to another room, make an angry face, raise up your hands like a bear, and growl. I know, it sounds super silly. But, try it and tell me if you don't feel better in 15 seconds! 

 

Schedule your free health coaching consultation to discover the personalized health coaching program that's right for you.

 

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